Where does time go?

This time last year it was my due date! I 100% knew Liv wouldn't be an early bird as her sister arrived 3 days late too.I can't believe how fast that has gone and in 5 days she will be ONE! She took her first steps two weeks away,two little wobbly ones but has since decided that is enough lol and has only took two more since haha,we have nicknamed her Nev after the little puppet on CbbC as all she says at the moment is "yeah".Olivia has also started giving kisses too which is just too cute,eeek she won't be a baby for much longer :(.
We are having a party which has turned out to be quite a big celebration but hey your only one once.We have everything ready now and just need to get the final touches,i can't wait,i think i'm more excited than Madison who has decided she wants to dress up as a princess-bless.
Then on the 10th September we are going away for a week in a lovely private cottage,just what we needed after this very up and down year.I can't wait to sink in the hot tub after a day out whilst the kids are in bed and just relax!

A Long Hard Day.

I sometimes wonder if i am cut out to be a mum on days like this when all Madison has wanted is daddy and i am "disgusting" or "awful" and Liv is winging the place down unless she is in my arms as her 5th/6th teeth are about to cut.Where is that hole i can just jump straight into?
Hoping tomorrow is better as i have had enough today!
**big sigh**

Oh blog how neglected you have been.I am sorry.

Whoa an update is LONG overdue!
Major milestones that have happened since the last update-Olivia is now crawling! and a right little speed demon she is too,she also is starting to pull to stand and has four teeth!.She is so different to Madison who didn't start doing this till 11 months.I'm not used to such a small baby crawling around lol.She also says "mummuma,dadada,iiiyaaa and nanana".
Liv also had her 8-12 month check on Tuesday and all is well although her weight gain is a bit slow i'm not concerned she is meeting development milestones and still getting mummy milk plus she eats for England so i imagine she just burns alot off lol.
Madison is doing great also although she doesn't like sleeping in her own room at the moment as she thinks there are monsters in there-bless! So she has been sleeping in our room something we are going to tackle tomorrow-wish me luck! lol.Madison's speech has always been good but now it is amazing,i love our little conversations and sing alongs,her favourite song at the moment is ba ba black sheep :) she sings this word for word and even says "one for incy spider"-too cute!
Here are my beautiful girls doing row row row your boat together



Now myself i'm doing good,i try not to let my job get me own but it's so hard when it is the most boring job going and you have someone lurking over your back to see if you have got your sales for the day.I did get a job offer from a care company but they operate on a zero hours contract which is useless so i am only doing bank work for them.I need to do an unpaid training course with them then i can start but they rang me the other day saying they couldn't get a reference from one of my previous jobs and could i chase it up.Eh? that is what your paid for!
I think for the moment being i am going to concentrate on doing my driving lessons,i just need to do something proactive.I feel such a failure i am no where near what i want to be and i want my girls to be proud of me.

Where to begin?

I am now back at work,i had to do 2.5 weeks of training which was sheer hell,thankfully it has been done now and i got 97% in my home insurance regulations exam and 100% in my financial services license exam :).Nothing at work changes except the faces as the place has such a high turnover rate,they are not too happy that i am back at work a breastfeeding mama,i even had to go home on day 1 as they had no where for me to express,even had the cheek to suggest the toilet!!! Since then they have upped their game and booked a meeting room for me every day.I love finishing at 8pm going home then feeding my Liv she's usually asleep but i wake her up as she doesn't have much milk at the childminders usually 2-3oz.

Update on the kids.
Olivia has got her FIRST tooth,it is so cute! and took what seems like forever to come through seeing as Madison had a couple at this stage.You can just see it on this picture,it's her bottom front left one.


Olivia is still trying her hardest to crawl,she gets on all fours,starts rocking but has one foot stuck and just can't fathom it out.She will do it in her own time.

Madison is a nightmare at the moment,she really has got the terrible 2s.Everynight for the past i'd say four weeks she has woken up only one to two hours after going to bed screaming and moaning to come down or go into our bed.She then has taken a good 45 minutes to put back to sleep.It's either this or she will be a nightmare to put to sleep,last night read her 7 stories,yes 7 and she wanted more,i said "no" and went out of the room and she went CRAZY! The only thing that got her back into bed was me telling her i was going to take her beloved "bun bun" away which i feel mean for saying but it worked!
Her speech is coming on more and more,earlier in the bath she got on all fours and said "Look mummy i am swimming like a fish" hehe so cute.
This was her the other day at the park,they've just put loads of new stuff in including 3 slides,she loves it!

It's that time again.

My maternity leave is now up.I can't believe i have been off for nearly ten months.I am going back on the 3rd May and i have to do two silly weeks full time training.I am returning as a breastfeeding mama woop and work are being surprisingly cooperative.After the training i'll be back to my old 2.5 days a week.
After applying for several jobs and getting nowhere i have resigned myself to going back to my old job which i despise-sales.
I have never been so unhappy in my career.I am not a sales person,i couldn't sell sand to the Arabs.I want to do nursing/care work,if only someone would give me a chance but all it takes is someone to apply who has a teeny bit of experience and BHAM there's my chance gone.
I am thinking of doing some volunteer work at the hospital,helping the elderly around,making tea,helping the HCA's etc.I think i need to prove that it is what i want to do,which it is.I have been thinking about my career for years now and i know everyone says "wait a few years then concentrate on your career" but they do not work where i work.It is hell,they have such a high turnover that i will be surprised if any of my old colleagues still work there.
I am determined to have a new job by the end of the year.

How time flies.

I am 22 now! I feel old even though i'm not,the random grey hairs and bags under the eyes tell a different story.
An update on the girls,Olivia is trying to crawl,she sits up then throws herself forward,gets on all fours and starts rocking back and forth.I couldn't believe it! lol.She has also mastered sitting unaided now,she has amazing balance.I love her so much and her little chunky legs even if she can be the grumpiest baby going some days.
Madison is getting cheekier by the day,her speech is amazing and so clear.As it was my birthday she picked me a cinderella card and give it to me in the morning and said "Mummys birthday card,signed it" then i asked her who it was on it she replied "Barbie?" I said "no sweetie its Cinderella" she then replied "ooo we watched that film the other day".I can't believe she's only 2 she acts alot older!.
I had a quiet birthday,i just got myself a new piercing-Septum! which i love and some new clothes,i then went out for a lovely indian with some friends,it was nice to have some time out of the house without the kids.

Growing up so quick.

Olivia will be 7 months old next week,and has mastered sitting unaided for a good 5 minutes that is until she loses her balance lol.
I am also 22 next week eek,i feel old! Plans for my birthday have been left in ruin due to Paul's work being arseholes (excuse my french).Thankfully the lovely lady who owns the cottage has said we can go later in the year.So instead I'm getting my septum pierced and going out for a meal with friends,god knows how Olivia will be.A complete nightmare i imagine but Paul will have to manage haha.